I CARE

We are all familiar with these two words....and probably use or hear them every day. And as most everyday words that we use, we have somehow taken these words for granted.

Would one say it is because most times, it is used without an indepth understanding of its meaning?

"I care"....."I care about you", "I care about the earth", "I care about him/her", "I care about the homeless children", "It's because we care", "We care about this, we care about that".

But do we really care or, is it that we only care about ourselves? Is it about the person or people we care about or does it really balls down to our need to save ourselves unwanted pain or discomfort. We are so involve with ourselves so much to the extend that those we claim to care about are mostly hurt by us.

Lately, i found out that to care about someone or anyone, one needs to understand the true meaning of selflessness which by the way, can't be found in the built dictionary of alot of us.

The definition of SELFLESSNESS (n) according to Oxford Advanced learner's Dictionary defines it as "an ability to think more about the needs, happiness etc, of other people than about your own". Hard right? Yep!! However fear not, I hear this act can be learnt or imbibe. And no, can't help you on that one....you will have the expert on the act.

The act of selflessness is in the giving all and not expecting or wanting nothing; selflessness is a gift that is very rare especially in these callous and uncertain days. People with this attribute have nothing yet own all things.That's because they have all they need and want. They radiate with joy and gladness.

So, when we say we care, is it for selflessness or selfishness reasons? If notice, the "SELF" is quite apparent in both but it the degree at which it is apparent that matters.....MORE or LESS.

Therefore, before you tell someone you care.....ask yourself is it for more or less?

Be true n be Real!!

It's Gentlehawk

A gal's dairy 03

A friend of mine told me one day that Life is a bed full of roses, however, these roses have thorns. Interesting, isn't it? But, the best part is that if we want to enjoy these roses or the bed (well, depending on the case) we have to learn to get rid of these so-called thorns without destroying the roses. So, i guess what she was trying to say is that to enjoy Life ,we need to go through some pain. It gives us a better understanding of ourselves and the lives we live.Moreover, if these pains or experiences do not arise, how do we learn to see our lives in a different angle and thank the creator for it.

However, history has proven that humans have the tendency to go through the same painful process again before the lesson is learnt.

Why do we have to learn the hard way before we learn the lessons and ways of life? Now, you may think, "Oh! there she goes again". But really,it's a thought i can't seem to shake off. We go through painful stuff in life over and over again yet we do not learn from it. Why is that? Is it that we don't take time to look closer at prior experience(s) or we simply underestimated its reoccurance? Why do we have to go over the pains over and over again before we learn? Is it is insane or there is gain? Life as it is, is pretty smart than alot of us give it credit. Some of us just see life as a process and that we just have to go through it without understanding that we are the actors of it. Well as they say, life gets to dictate the tune but we forget that we can also dictate pace.

Taking a critical look at Life, we would see that there is nothing or any situation under the sun that have not happen before. If we look closely, we would see that life is pretty the same. Yet, we go ahead and make the same mistakes anyway. Maybe that's what make us human and defines our history. Is it how we are programmed or we simply just allow it? Maybe that's what differentiates us from other species. Maybe it is because of these reoccurances we are able to remain successful against all odds. We have evolved through it all and the stories have remained the same, just the names of the mistakes and pains change.

We are who we are because we believe we are who we are, contrary to what has been said. No one can define us but us, however, we can allow people, situation, environment define us....if and only if, we allow it. So, it still balls down to the fact that we are in charge. So, why go through the pain, again and again? I think the answer is in us been true and real, and accepting the pain and the fall. Re-access ourselves and understanding that one does not need to go through pain again to learn the lesson.

Maybe, i'm wrong or maybe i'm right, you be the judge....whatever you decide, I am just been ME....True and Real.So be too, by letting me know your take.

Be REAL, Be TRUE

It's Moi, Gentlehawk

Peace

CROSS ROADS

So guys,

What do they say about crossroads?
Some say that it is a point where people met and anything may/can happen.
That it is a time bomb waiting, watching and waiting for the right time to explode.
Cross roads are things from the past, where the present meets the future.
It is pain, it is stain yet so, clean, clear and rare.

Many of us have been there and most of us haven't dare.
We all wish for a point on the crossroad.
so we walk, work and play smart to see those who rule
If we would reach the very point that will either make us or break us.
Cross roads come in the T's or the X's.

Whichever way we call it, it is a meeting point for you and me.
"It's nice meeting you." - "So where are you off to?"
"How can i get there?" - "Oh, it's not too far!"
"Don't bother to go there!" - "And what'll i do next?"
A great and disjoined meeting point it is and can be.

I would hate to be cut in that webbly point but it is a great feeling 'cos it will get you there
if you find the right way
But not to worry, even if you miss it this time, retrace it and you will be surprised
that the cross roads are always there and the same.
Atleast now you know where not take... and what not to do.

We all have cross roads, we all stop or pause there - to catch a breathe or retrace a step
Cross roads are important especially if you are willing to find the WAY
whatever way you wish to go.....be sure to know....That, to be REAL and TRUE...will save you alot too.

So, it's Gentlehawk
Hold it up and be REAL

FRIENDSHIP

Zzzzzzz!!! I decided to try things my way this time. No taking orders or thoughts from anyone except me. Who cares if i am wrong or right? It is called SPONTANEOUS!!! It's called been ME!

Over the years, I've let things, people, situations, challenges, environment dictate to me how to and should live my life. So, now I'm saying, no more calling out..... to this gal. I choose to be me and no one else.....I'm blessed to have wonderful yet not perfect people around me who love me for me. And also thankful for the fact that there are, so called people, who say they are friends but are yet to understand the meaning of the word. Who are so nice and happy with you as long as they take from you and are incredibly the opposite when things are not the way they want it to be.

So, I am asking who need friends, who need people, who need family and who needs YOU?

Crazy as it seems, the answer is ME, ME, ME!!!! We all need someone.....it is how we are built and programmed; and nothing can replace that need except we fill it with precious and priceless people. FRIENDS.

Heard it all from the so called friends....why are true friends so hard to find in this time and age? Is it that people are now self-centred or is it that true friendship don't mean much anymore...well they say "since i can do by myself, thank you very much" or is it that we aren't looking at the right people or is it that we are looking at the right people for the wrong reasons. But really, friendship is one thing in Life i will always thank God for.

Friendship has help sharpen our lives whichever way we look at it....good or bad. Friendship amongst family member, tribe, strangers, peers, colleagues etc, this undeserving and strange bond takes place.

It's one thing that happens every day yet we do not take it seriously.It moulds us or it breaks us. We let it come in quietly and let it slip away without a second glance. Just a few take it seriously, guide with every breathe, keep it close to their heart, cherish it and nurture it daily through out their life time.

We all long for it.....but we hardly work for it. We grave for it yet do nothing about it. We give up on it when we are faced with issues that overwhelm us. We throw in the towel and say, "What the hell! I can do it on my own....whichever way i want".

We get uncomfortable when it challenges our actions, policies, what makes us thick and most of all, who we are and what we really stand for.

But we usually forget that this is what moulds us into something or ....rather someone special. In order words, our friends(Relationships) define us....and what we stand for.

An adage said, "Show me your friends and i will tell you who you are".

If you want a change in life than i strongly advice you change your friends (Relationship).

So, I'll tell you who you are once i meet your friends because they help us keep it real and true.

Therefore, to know me, please do me a favour, check out my FRIENDS. I love my friends because we love KEEPING IT REAL 'N' TRUE!

Bye For Now
Gentlehawk

WHATZUP

Wait!!! what is wrong with the WORLD? Please can someone tell what the hell is going on? Can you believe it, my daddy comes home to announce that he just lost his job and he picks up a freaking GUN and shots us all (n i mean ME, my SIBLING, his WIFE - for twenty-something years). What the heck is that!!! Okay, u lost ur job, and so? Is that the end of the world? I guess it simply shows how shallow the human race has just become.

Noone gives a damn about other people's lives or have respect for HUMAN lives. They just destroy what they didn't create in the first place....and in seconds too.

I really don't get the fact that someone, could just wake up one day and decides to destroy(don't forget, in a matter of seconds) what he/she took so many years, so many emotions, time and sacrifices blah blah blah....to build. It's absolutely beyond me!!!! How and When did Human race become this callous. GOD! Why, why????

This Life we live is way too beautiful, irrespective of what we are going through or what is going through us. Tough times makes us stronger and help us see the REAL US: for who we really are. It is not suppose to be great all through because if it is, then life will be preettttty boring. Tough times shakes us and helps us to put things/our lives in better persective.

My heart goes out to the children who didn't get the chance to enjoy life and be someone great!!

Who didn't get the chance to experience the great things of life; first kiss, prom, become the prom king or queen, the known nerd of the school,first date, first heartbreak, first success, first disappointment, first job interview, first one to win the school's prize and many FIRSTS.

And for those people who think they do have RIGHTS to take the lives of other people including theirs......shame on you one million times over. SHAME! SHAME!! SHAME!!!

And those so call Authority who can't do something or rather won't do something to put a stop to these craziness that is worst than cancer, don't forget, it could happen to YOU too......so watch you back!!!!!

I'm Real n True!!!
cos i'm Gentlehawk

A gal's dairy 02

"A day will come and you will see me no more...." It's a quote and i think i'm begining to understand the indepth of that sentence. I do feel lost today. I feel my life is without direction and i feel empty.

Hey, before you begin to imagine how empty my life is, let me give you some tips into my life. I have alot going for me until recently and it seems to be slipping away. I'm a young beautiful woman with a good career that will put in the spotlight as soon as i'm ready. My social network is above average but social life is zero. My love life is so close to a nun's. I live a triangle type of life, that's to say, home,work, school. There's nothing and i mean absolutely nothing interesting going on in my life. I hate going out for shopping and clubbing like normal girls do. I would rather stay home to read a book, write(like i'm doing now) or watch a movie. What kind of girl does that? BINGO!!! a Boring one! I simply miss those good and simple old days when i had the right to feel free. Love irrespective of who and how. When i had true but few friends. When my parents were still much in love. When in the evenings, i will put in a good show for everyone in the living room and i have a good and honest laugh with those people who love me for me. Why do life have to be so so complicated. I guess it is part of growing up. When i was little i couldn't wait to grow up, have my freedom and enjoy life. i thought grow ups had everything tey wanted....how childish that thought is right now. i would give everything i own to be a child right now.

But can't, can i? So i better get a grip and enjoy what i have so i won't grow old and regret what i have missed and lost. I guess there is nothing wrong in wishing just remember it pays more to be REAL and TRUE!

So for Moi,
Peace n Out!
Gentlehawk

THE MASK

Hey guys,

I wrote this article years ago and looking at the world today, I have an urge to share it once again.

So happy reading!

Wow, Wow..... just finished watching my favourite sitcom, "Grey's Anatomy' and i had to say,"Wow! Life is really very short not to be real and true to who you really are!  

In this particular episode, Meredite drown while trying to rescue a man,  not because she couldn't swim but basically because she gave up on her life even before it began. 

She's so young yet very messed up in the head, why? She feels everything she holds dear isn't making any sense to her anymore…or rather everyone she thought or really loves  isn't who they say they are. 

NEEDING something is definitely different from WANTING something, and she helped define that clearly.

And there is Izzie and O'malliey, that pair i don’t seem to understand. Just the opposite of our gal (and by the way i should say, i am a big fan of these two). They are getters and when i mean getters, i mean, they go for whatever they believe they need (not that they can't do without it) irrespective of who gets hurts. 

But O'Malliey is one character that seem to put me over board. His posture is way out unstable but inwardly he is as stable and strong as an Arabian Horse. And there is Alex, the "Player", who thinks being emotional makes  him look weak and re-live his childhood which he would rather forget. Though inwardly, he is a good man(which by the way, he does a good job of hiding). 

And my favourite, Christina, the hard core perfectionist who thinks life is all just about competing to be the best and anything less, isn't acceptable.

This sitcom makes me realize that we all, in a way have a Meredite, Izzie, Alex, O'Malliey and Christina in us that makes life kind of crazy yet exciting, stupid yet meaningful. 

I know i've a Meredite in me, who wants to be loved always but is so scared of getting hurt. And also a Christina, who is hurting but hides it by been tough and all. She sees any need of emotion as being weak. 

We are these people and more... this is what makes our life worth living. Life has to have its up and down,  else we will take it for granted. 

Society has so refined us, that being our true self isn't enough, so we are forced to be someone else. We all have something to hide and how best way to hide than to wear masks. 

Mask to keep people at arms length because to us it is best way to keep safe. We convince ourselves that when we wear it long enough we can become the mask/the other person and never hurt again.

But you know what, i'm done wearing masks. You should too. 

I want to be me..ME! It's a lot easier to be me. I want to be able to say how i feel without getting crucify for it. I want to be able to love and take great risk to be loved. I want to be able to make stupid mistakes because that's what makes me human. I want to be able to go swimming in a pool full of HOT guys and pretty girls and display my stretch makes without feeling shy or feel self ….. But infact wanting to flaunt my femininity. I want to be able to think up something crazy and just do it not because it is good but because it feels good and it is fun. I want to be able to go shopping n partying like other girls. I want to be able to live life every minute, every second of the day and seize the moment as it comes.

Above all, i want to do ME, Me, Me and not because some societal ideology sees or say it is right!!! No, but because it is just enough for me. Selfish you may say and that's exactly what I would want  to be …so selfish, THAT I WON’T NEED MY MASK ANYMORE.  We all need to be selfish at one point in time in one's life. It helps to put things in good perspective..... A times!

So stay Real and stay True, it pays and there's gain.

Peace and  Out!

Gentlehawk